Cheat Sheet For Life

Even teacher’s would recommend this advantage…

If someone asks you what life supposed to be about, what would you say?

In any era, the subject of Life has been complex. It has increased by the fact that now you are connected to so many people around the world.

Someone sitting on a toilet seat halfway across the world, you never met, can judge and sometimes influence your choices by a reaction or comment.

Everything is changing at a fast pace except for few constants throughout generations:

Life gives you lessons. Lessons shape your life

Once we have these lessons, we wish we knew everything before to make life easier.

If only there was some cheat sheet that enlightened us in advance. So let’s come up with one.

The Dont’s

The majority of our lessons teach us what not to do in life. So first up, the don’t list.

Time Traveller

An interesting question to ask someone is — Given a time machine to go back in time, what would you change?

Realistically, it sounds fictional, there can never be such a time machine. But everyone of us has that time machine.

Our mind is a time machine, because it remembers every important thing we did in the past.

Almost everyone sits around wondering if only the stars had aligned right at a certain moment we would — mend a relationship, capture an opportunity or become the hero the world needed but now will never know.

A variation of the above question — Where do you want to be in the future?

Now you would say, this is a good thing. Right?

Well Yes and No.

Yes, you should plan for the future, but no you don’t have to always live for the future. Understanding these two are entirely different things is the key.

The Present time is an expendable currency. Always worrying about what will happen in the future or what you could have changed in the past is just wasting the present.

You might not have the means to do things you want right now. So do the things now you have the means for.

To get the most out of life, you do not need a time machine, but rather your mind being in the time you are physically present with experience of the past and hopes for a good future.

TL;DR Live in the present

Socially Influenced

The world we live in influences. Before the influencers in our life were very less i.e. family, close friends. The advent of social media has increased this number many folds, from a person uploading a video to some random person liking or commenting on our posts.

This leads to turmoil, we get pushed to a path instead of choosing it. Decisions regarding what we wear, the job we take or whether we marry outside our community and list keeps growing.

Everything is judged and commented on. We can look into it like this…

Society is like a mobile app, it’s there to serve a purpose for the individual. But unlike the development of mobile apps, developers(social reformers) of society often don’t update the version of society with the speed of the changing world and still cling on to the norms of the older versions of society.

Waiting for society to come up to speed makes no sense. Just like you don’t like every app feature, society will not like everything about you. AND THAT’S OK!!!!

Everyone does not need to like you. Just a few genuine one’s who will like you for who you already are.

We don’t need to be rude to everyone who give us suggestions. The ultimate task is recognizing what’s best for us and what’s not.

End of the day, you hold the final decision of who influences you and who doesn’t.

Perennial Racer

We’ve been told that life is a race. From childhood, we are always told to chase someone else’s dream. Be it studies, our job, our relationships. There is always a dread that we will be left behind.

And we start running without even knowing why.

Every time you reach a goal, the goalpost shifts because there is always a new person who has something you don’t.

Yes, life is a race, more like a marathon. No one tells you its not with someone else but yourself. It’s about being better than you were in the past. No chasing what other’s have, but step by step levelling up to what you want to be.

Don’t need to work according to other’s whim and fancies. Everyone has their own circumstances and challenges. Understand your path is different just like your circumstances.

Stop running this mindless race, chasing what makes others happy. Rather find what makes you happy and put everything you have into it.

Masked Identity

Our lives are characterised by the masks we wear in public. The person we want other’s to admire. These days we want to put up an appearance that shows us in the best light, living the perfect life.

People go to vacations or pubs and put exotic captions of the fun time there, while barely conversing with each other going through social media. On the other hand, people have terrible fights in their lives, but want you to see all the love in their life.

We enjoy events on photos rather than when we were present there.

Masks are our superhero identity socially. They also work because people nowadays aspire to be like someone else.

We start thinning the line between genuine and appearance. Living in denial of who we actually are.

Accepting who we are makes us stop leading dual lives. We accept ourselves and our issues rather than other’s opinion of us.

Key to keeping life simple is being genuine.

Get rid of the masks…

Destiny Child

You’ll get what’s written in your destiny — something we have heard often. Seems like being part of some puppet show where all outcomes are defined and you just have to go through the motions.

People want you to believe this because they never tried anything themselves or gave up easily.

Yes, a lot of things do not depend on your actions because numerous individuals are involved sometimes. Does not mean that everything you do does not matter.

Those who wait for destiny to do something, have the destiny of people around them (if people around you are satisfied billionaires, then good job!!).

People who start changing their destiny, can have a say in what their life ends up to be.

Don’t listen to people who try to put a ceiling on you. It’s up to you to reach new heights every time.

The Do’s

Now that we have figured out what not to do. Let’s see what we can do to make our life a whole lot easier.

Decision Entrepreneur

Life can be a sum of decisions. The decisions we take decides paths we follow. We often depend on others for our decisions. Due to the fear of getting it wrong.

Removing this fear requires thinking like an entrepreneur does. We have to start making decisions from small to big. You can get advice, but no one running your life for you.

Sooner you start, sooner you shape up your life. You would make a lot of wrong decisions at the start. It’s good to get those out at the start of your life.

With enough experience, when it matters the most you would make more correct than wrong ones. Even when you make the wrong ones, you would know how to convert them to right ones.

It’s due to making so many decisions in life.

Making decisions teaches us to persevere, endure and eventually overcome when faced with obstacles.

Like an entrepreneur does business, start testing the waters with your own decisions.

Consequence Owner

Life has its consequences. Good ones are met with great pride and ownership. Bad ones follow a series of blaming either some person or the divine.

Just like good ones, we need to own up to bad consequences as well instead of putting it on the situation or some other person.

Sometimes things are not because of us, but more often it’s our actions which are the deciding factor.

Sooner you accept something bad that happened, faster you can start making mends for it.

Take decisions and face their results. Facing situations get rid of any fear of failure and anxiety towards attempting things. This helps you to move forward. You don’t have to look over your shoulders all the time for your regrets.

Auto-Pilot Life

Society has always been very result oriented. We try to control everything around us.

The conflict comes when control goes beyond us, like how people will see us, the outcome of our actions, our future. We need to remember

We can only control what’s in our hands — Our effort.

It’s mind-numbing to speculate about the impact. Everything happens in due time. We need to trust our efforts.

Let the part of us wanting to controlling outcomes run on auto-pilot and be less concerned. Eventually everything comes together if you let the situation be. By the end, we start appreciating the process more than the result.

Journey Architect

At some point we all want to fit into some group . We have a need to be liked. We look up to people and try to be like them because other’s like them.

Often this leads to an impersonation complex where we try to mirror someone else’s life blueprint. It can be someone from our family or people around us.

Trying to be so much like the other person, we lose ourselves.

Always find your own life’s blueprint. Be the architect of your own journey

The path to constructing your own journey may not be as inclusive as copying other’s. It may not get other’s approval as much.

One day down the road you would get people who matter most to you and will like who you are rather than a shadow of someone else.

So always be original because you were created to be so.

Self Therapist

We sometimes feel down in life, have doubts, anxieties and deep seated insecurities. Can be very addictive to feel bad and stay there feeling pity for ourselves for days, months or even years.

We keep fighting something within us and are not able to come out of it.

Often we punish ourselves as the villains of our lives. What we actually needed is to understand ourselves.

There are instances we don’t open up to people and keep things hidden. But we want people to understand and find out what’s wrong with us.

No one can just know something we don’t show. Being vulnerable is not easy. Reaching out to people is the greatest moment of self therapy you can give yourself.

Give people the confidence to reach out to you. It may be a mode of self therapy for them.

It’s a short life to be addicted to feeling sad and doubtful. Take the weight off your shoulder and share it. Understand what works for you in the long run.

The Eventual Answer

Knowing all this should not make you arrogant to think that you have conquered life. The thing about life is it has many levels. Each one has unique challenges.

There is no final boss fight. In fact, there are many boss fights increasing your level at every step. Always ensuring a new challenge for you.

Coming back to the question, what’s life supposed to be about ?

Life is an experience. To each his own — good, bad or completely out of the box.

Life’s supposed to be — A Journey of Experiences.

Hope the above cheat sheet enhances your experiences. If you identify with any or all of the above, remember you are not alone.